Adrift
by 263Adder
Summary: Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Sequel to Silence & Silence Part II. Originally published on A03 where I use the same username.
1. Chapter 1

"May?" Coulson said in surprise as the SUV rolled up the ramp.

"Did she come back?" Simmons said breathlessly in the doorway of the laboratory. She'd been sobbing ever since Skye left.

Only May got out of the car.

She hadn't realised how petrified she was until the plane was about to land. She'd been amazed at how calm she felt taking off although during the flight it felt impossible to sleep. She felt she needed to stay alert.

But when the nose of the plane dipped the memory of the plane spiralling, falling apart creeped up on her and brought her out in a cold sweat. The sweet old lady next to her had held her hand. She'd though Skye (Sarah) had a phobia of flying. She'd reassured her that plane crashes were very rare.

She ended up in Saint Vincent's. She chose a small town with no wifi.

At first she thought it had been a terrible idea. After about three hours of arriving she went into computer withdrawal. But what could she even do now. She wanted to get away from her hacking. That's the only reason organisations like S.H.I.E.L.D and the Rising Tide had ever wanted her. Because she could use a computer. She'd looked to them to be her surrogate family. She'd thought they thought she was special. As usual she'd been stupid.


	2. Chapter 2

Ward came up from the makeshift gym to find May and Coulson with their heads together at the bar. They fell silent when they saw him.

He stalked past them back to his bunk hiding his bleeding hands underneath a towel.

He'd thought working out would help distract him. But when he'd been down there all he could think of were all the times he'd been there with Skye. The way she'd pull faces at Fitzsimmons through the glass, how she'd make inappropriate jokes when Ward held her too close, how she'd get this look of determination every time Ward showed her a difficult move.

Thankfully no one had been in the lab today. They were probably still holed up in Simmons room where Fitz had eventually dragged her when they realised she wasn't coming back.

If they had been there he would have had to stay collected. Maintain the calm exterior that all specialists wore.

He thought back to what Skye said. About specialists working alone. It wasn't until she was gone that he realised how much he hated working alone now. With anyone else it was a mild irritation but with her at his side he had finally started to feel like more than just an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. He'd started to feel like a human being again.

"So where are you from?" The man behind the bar asked. Apart from a couple of regulars sat outside she was the only one in the place, although the night was still young.

"America."

"Ah, anywhere I would know?"

She fell back on the old lie she used to tell when she didn't want to talk about her past. "Nowhere in particular really. My dad was in the army, we moved a lot."

"Are you here on holiday?"

Skye smiled. It felt wrong. "I guess I just needed to get away from it."

The man nodded like that made perfect sense.

"You came alone?"

"Yes. I came alone."

Again he nodded sympathetically and silently passed her a drink.


	3. Chapter 3

The weather was oppressive. The humidity hung in the air and made Skye's restless nights so much worse.

This was probably when she missed them the most. When she woke up in the middle of the night convinced she was still holding onto a dead man's hand. When the slightest noise made her convinced someone else was there. Playing with her. Tormenting her.

The only relief came when the sun rose. It was the only time she really began to feel like herself again. She spent a lot of the time either on the beach or ambling through the little town.

During the day she felt like she could happily keep being Sarah Lawrence the woman without a care in the world.

At night she held the burner in her hand like it was the only thing keeping her alive.

She should have known that she couldn't keep it up. That she'd have to face reality at some point.

She'd left the hula girl behind. Ward found it there wobbling on her window ledge. He'd resisted coming in the last few days although he already knew that Simmons had taken the blanket she'd once tried to knit and Fitz had taken one of her books.

He picked it up in his hands. The amount of times he'd come into her bunk and found Skye lying on the bed idly prodding the figure to make it move. It was one of the few things she'd brought with her so why had she left it behind?

Dropping it on her bed he turned and breathed the room in. It still smelt like her.

Acting on impulse he stormed off to the cockpit where he knew May had gone after dinner.

He wasn't quiet in his approach and wasn't surprised that she'd put the plane on autopilot and was turned in her seat waiting for him to enter.

He shut the door.

"I want to know where she is."

"I told all of you before" May said with a hint of exasperation "I don't know where she is. I gave her some money and a passport and a _choice_." She emphasised. "She has a phone. If she needs us she'll call."

"You have the number for the phone?"

She gave him a look. "I've been over this with Coulson and he agreed. We risk alienating her more if we don't give her space right now."

"Give me the number May." He said trying to keep his voice calm and failing.

She just gave him a look.

His voice faltered. "May. I need to talk to her. _Please_."

If he was having any effect on her she didn't show it. He didn't give up though.

"I have to know she's okay. Alright?"

"If she wasn't she'd call."

"She's stubborn."

"So are you."

"Please." Ward took a deep breath and, hating that it had come to this, let out what he'd been thinking for a week now. "This is my fault. I'm her SO I'm meant to protect her. I already let her get hurt once. If I'd just parachuted earlier. If I hadn't stopped to check the bodies. She wouldn't have had to pull the trigger. She'd still be here."

"You don't know that." May cut across. "She's been put through more than killing someone Ward. She was put in a very difficult situation."

"She shouldn't have been in that situation at all." He half yelled back.

"She knew what being a member of S.H.I.E.L.D involved. And you need to know that you can't protect her for the rest of her life. You won't be her SO forever. She needs to learn to stand on her own two feet and _so do you_."

"What's that supposed to mean?" He said taking a step back almost pushing himself up against the door.

"Let's just say the only person on this plane that doesn't know you love Skye is Skye."

He left the cockpit with no further arguments for the phone number. But that didn't mean he was giving up. Ward might not be as good on a computer as Skye but he knew how to access security footage and he was going to find out where she went if it killed him.


	4. Chapter 4

Some people would call it stealing. Ward preferred to say that he _commandeered_ the plane.

He didn't tell Coulson or May. He knew they'd try to stop him. He didn't tell Fitzsimmons. He knew they'd want to come.

It was only a small plane. Just big enough for himself and one other person.

It became a habit, going to the bar. It's not like she was drowning her sorrows or anything. She just found the routine comforting.

What she didn't expect when she went in was for the bartender to say to her in a hushed voice. "Sarah. Another American was just in the bar. He said he was looking for someone. He described her and I think he's looking for you. I said I didn't know anyone called Skye or anyone who looked like you but if he asks other people they might say something…"

She quickly masked her look of concern and patted his hand. "Thank you so much. It's not a problem. I knew this would happen eventually."

She stood up.

"Sarah?" He said. How sad. She didn't even know his name.

"It's okay. I guess I should go back. It looks like I'm going to be entertaining tonight."

She walked up to her hotel door and paused. She felt her body instinctively tense.

Nevertheless she put the key in the lock and entered the room. She'd left the white curtains drawn and the windows open to try and cool the room down. He sat on the bed.

"Skye." He jumped up in relief and would have touched her if he hadn't seen her flinch.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to surprise you." Ward kept his hands to his side not wanting to make her uncomfortable.

"What are you doing here?" Skye asked. "May said…"

"I know and I swear she refused to help me find you."

Skye nodded slowly and moved to sit on the couch beneath the window.

Ward hesitated and then sat back down on the edge of the bed.

"Why did you come here?" He asked.

"It was the first flight out which still had available seats." She murmured.

Silence hung in the room again which only felt awkward on her end.

"Ward why are you here?" She eventually said her voice sounding strained.

"I had to see you."

"Why?"

"I just had to see you."

She didn't know how to respond and just fell silent again.

After another moment Ward abruptly stood up and walked to the couch and sat right beside her. He took her hand ignoring how his sudden movements had literally made her jump.

"Skye."

She looked up at him her dark eyes attentive.

"Come back with me."

"Ward…"

"Or if you still need time I'll wait here with you." He stood up. "I'll go downstairs and get a room right now."

"Do the others know that you're here?"

"Yes."

She looked at him suspiciously.

"Well I left a note."

She seemed mildly surprised. "Then how did you get here?"

"I commandeered a plane."

"You stole a plane?"

"Commandeered."

She actually smiled. Genuinely this time. "If you say so robot."

"That was worth the whole trip."

She obviously understood what he meant and he was pleased to see her blush a little.

"Ward you can't stay here. You have your job."

"And you have yours."

She looked pained. "You don't need me."

"Yes we do." He insisted. "I don't think you understand how much this has affected us all. Simmons keeps crying. Fitz keeps stealing your stuff – I think he's building a shrine. Coulson just stares out of the window and May spends all of her spare time in the cockpit now. And then there's this."

He pulled her hula girl out of his duffel bag.

"Why'd you bring that?"

"I think the real question is why did you leave it in the first place?"

"I forgot it."

"No. I think you just knew that you'd be coming back."


	5. Chapter 5

She wordlessly took the toy and idly poked it to make it move.

"Skye?"

It was dark in that room but not dark enough that he couldn't see a tear roll down her cheek.

"I miss you all too."

He pulled her into his arms which confused her even more. Since when was the T-1000 a hugger?

"Then come home."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"Because it's not just a home. It's a life. And…Ward I don't want to have to kill someone again…"

His heart broke a little.

"I don't like it. I don't want to."

"No one's going to make you do that Skye."

"What choice is there? It's what being part of S.H.I.E.L.D means."

"No it doesn't."

"Yes it does."

"Skye, Fitzsimmons have never killed anyone."

"It's different they're not field agents."

"You can switch disciplines."

"And do what? I'm just a hacker I'm nothing special."

He held her back from him and looked her in the eye. "You are the most special person I know. You can do anything you want Skye."

She sighed.

"Listen to me. You will never have to kill someone again. I promise."

"You can't promise that Ward. You won't be there forever. You'll get reassigned eventually, it's what you want." A few months ago that would've been true. Now he hated the idea of any life that didn't involve his team and most importantly _her_.

"Yes I will."

She slouched back against the couch obviously not believing him. May was right. Apparently the only person who didn't know that he loved Skye was Skye.

"Skye you have to know you mean a lot to me."

"Yeah yeah I know, the special SO rookie relationship is really something."

Why couldn't he just bring himself to say the words? Maybe because he was trained not to. Spies don't fall in love.

"That's not what I meant."

"Comradeship."

"No."

"Then what _do_ you mean Ward?"

"I mean…_Iloveyou_." He muttered under his breath.

"_Sorry_ _what_?"

He took a deep breath. "I love you." It was amazing how harsh he made the words sound. "Now can we please go home?" He stood up and put his hands on his hips like he used to do when they were training and she started whining about something.

"You love me?"

"I just said that. Yes."

"Oh."

_Oh?_

He turned around to look for her bag so he could start cramming her stuff in it and drag her ass back to that plane when he felt her soft hand land on his shoulder and turn him around.

"What took you so long?" Was all she said before she pulled him down and kissed him.


	6. Chapter 6

"Does this mean you're coming back." Ward said eventually. They were sat on the couch and he had his arms wrapped around her.

She bit her lip.

"Skye. If you want we can stay here for a while longer. You don't have to rush back into things. And when, _if_, we do go back you don't have to go into the field. When we have missions you can be like Fitz and Simmons and stay on the plane – monitor comms, hack video feeds. And if you don't want to be on the plane then we'll find something else."

"But you'll stay with me?" She said hesitantly.

"I'll always stay with you."

"Because you love me?"

"I love you."

She leaned forward and kissed him again. "I'll go back to the plane."

Ward nodded but didn't move.

"Do you think Coulson will let us…?" She trailed off as she didn't know how to define them.

"Relationships between colleagues are discouraged but not prohibited." He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "You don't have to worry about that. You don't have to worry about anything. I'll always be here. I'll always help you."

She looked up at him before wriggling out of his arms. She crossed over to the wardrobe and pulled out her bag.

"Where'd you park?"

She closed her eyes as Ward started flipping switches. The dark had closed in now.

The airplane was small, smaller than the one she'd been in…she shut off that memory. There was no way in hell she was going to start thinking about that now.

"Skye?" Ward asked and she turned her head to the noise keeping her eyes firmly shut.

"Hmm."

"We're taking off now. Are you okay?"

"Yep." She lied. "Just thought I'd take a nap."

"Oh." He said and she wasn't sure if he bought it. "That's a good idea."

She turned her face away and sunk into the chair a little bracing herself as the plane started taxiing. She didn't understand it. When the plane had taken off from Portland she wasn't nearly this bad. Maybe it was something with being on a small plane again. Being on an S.H.I.E.L.D plane again.

When the plane started to increase in speed and she felt herself get pushed into the chair as they slowly lifted off the ground she had to bite her tongue to stop herself from whimpering. How in hell was she going to be able to live on a plane if this kept happening?

They eventually levelled out and Skye didn't realise she was shaking until put his hand on her arm.

"Hey." He said. "It's okay. We've reached altitude now."

Skye just nodded burning with embarrassment. What was wrong with her? She was going mad that was it.

"Skye." He said softly and she turned to him and slowly opened her eyes. "The plane's on autopilot come here." Grant unbuckled his seatbelt and reached over to undo hers. When she didn't move he tugged on her arm and brought her to sit on his lap. He cradled her for a little while before speaking.

"There's no shame in it you know."

She just nodded.

"Once after I'd had a nasty combat op I'd gone back to base and there were some fireworks. At the first bang I automatically drew my weapon and dove behind a bin thinking that someone was attacking us. I felt ridiculous."

Skye looked up at him. "Do you think I'll get over it?"

"With time." He said. "I think you can do anything you set your mind to."


	7. Chapter 7

"Jemma." Fitz yelled running into her bunk. "Jemma you've got to come quick, they're back. Skye and Ward. They're back." And then he ran back out without giving her so much as a second to respond.

When Coulson had found Ward's note he'd been, well furious was an understatement. Livid might be the more appropriate word.

Jemma automatically set down her book and hurried downstairs at hearing Skye's name. Although in retrospect she'd only known Skye for a short time she'd become one of her best friends. Fitz would always be the most important person in her world but there were certain things that having a friend who was a girl made a lot easier. Something about being forced into such tight living quarters and frequently being put in life or death situations of course contributed to her growing friendship with Skye. She couldn't talk to Fitz about how much she was scared for his life every time he went out in the field, he'd just tell her she was being silly. But Skye listened to her. Skye comforted her. She couldn't even begin to express how hurt she was when she realised that Skye didn't rely on her in the same way. There was nothing she wanted to do more than to help Skye. But to see her just run away. Stung.

As Jemma made her way into the holding bay she was greeted by the sight of Skye tucked in Agent Coulson's arms looking small and fragile. With everything that went on sometimes Skye seemed older than she really was. It was moments like these which served to remind her otherwise.

When Skye caught her eye she slowly slipped out of Coulson's arms, although he looked pretty reluctant to let her go and hesitantly made her way over.

Her face was solemn. She looked scared. Jemma didn't even wait for a response. She just pulled her into her arms and said "Welcome home Skye."

They eventually pulled her into the lounge where Skye sat between Coulson and Simmons while the rest of them sat on the surrounding couches. Ward looked afraid to turn his back on her for one second and Fitz felt equally unsettled like one little thing would make her leave again. Only May looked calm, comfortably lounging and looking out of the window.

The bus was still in Portland. They were still liaising with the S.H.I.E.L.D facility here into their investigation of the terrorist cell Skye had been investigating. It had been determined that the pilot had planted and then detonated some explosives on the plane to take out the agents situated in the back. And thanks to Skye's statement they knew he had been after the information Skye had stolen. Hopefully a series of arrests were being made that would bring an end to this unfortunate mess.

Fitz felt uncomfortable with the silence. He wanted to ask questions. He wanted to know where Skye went. He wanted to know how Ward convinced her to come back. He wanted to know why they weren't talking about it.

Eventually he broke and stood up. Everyone immediately turned their attention to him.

"I'm er, just going to the kitchen." He said quickly feeling he had to excuse his movement. "Anyone want anything?"

"No thank you Fitz." Coulson said after a pause.

He didn't realised Jemma followed him until they reached the kitchen.

"Oh, I would have brought you that." He said as she moved to get a bottle of water.

"No it's alright. I needed to move a little anyway. The quiet in there is a bit…"

"Stifling?" Fitz offered helpfully.

"Yes."

He drew closer to her. "I know what you mean. I mean, are we supposed to talk about it or forget it ever happened?"

"I don't know Fitz. But I don't think we can pretend it never happened."

"Then we should talk about it." He insisted.

"I think we need to let Skye come to us in her own time. Coulson was right, we can't push her to talk. We might just end up pushing her away again."

"I don't know Jems. This whole thing just seems so…" He was lost for words. Thankfully Jemma always knew what he meant regardless.

"Isn't it." She agreed.

Once again he felt grateful, like he does almost every day, to have Simmons here. There were times that he didn't think he would be able to make it through the hours without her here to keep him sane. Recently it felt like every week they were walking into some unknown threat and he was becoming more and more scared that their luck might be running out.

And if something did happen. If one of them were to…would he regret not having told Jemma that he…


	8. Chapter 8

When Simmons got up to leave Ward immediately eyed the space that had opened up to Skye's left. What he didn't expect was for May to beat him to it.

He watched in amazement as The Cavalry gently pulled Skye back to lean on her shoulder and began to stroke her hair with a touch so light Ward wouldn't be surprised if Skye didn't feel it.

If Coulson found it strange he didn't let it on. He just turned to look towards both women and smiled as he held Skye's hand.

There hadn't been time when they'd entered the plane to tell Coulson about him and Skye. Although given that he was dealing with Phil Coulson chances were the man already knew.

He let his eyes slip back to Skye. She was finally sleeping calmly. Everyone's presence seemed to sooth her. Ward reckoned she'd been afraid to come back. Afraid that everyone would have given up on her by now and would reject her. Being welcomed back so quickly must have put her mind to rest.

Just when he thought it was probably safe for him to let his eyes shut for just a few minutes he heard a small whine and looked over to see Coulson rubbing Skye's arm trying to reassure her in whatever nightmare she was having. May's hands stilled on her forehead.

Suddenly she jerked awake and pulled herself forward looking disorientated.

"Skye." Coulson said softly. She turned to look at him her cheeks flushed. "It's alright. We're on the bus."

She nodded but still sat up straight like she was afraid to lean back, probably scared that if she did she might fall back asleep and return to the nightmare.

May at the very least must have figured out their relationship as she relinquished her spot on the couch and moved to the bar allowing Ward to come to Skye's side.

"It's okay." He murmured and pulled her tightly into his arms. He could feel her heart pounding. "You're okay."

She pulled away. "I need to…I'm going to my bunk. To sleep." Her voice sounded wooden.

Ward was unphased. He knew she hated being weak.

"I'll check on you in a minute." He promised.

"You don't need to." She insisted.

"I know. But I will."

She nodded and made her way to her bunk and slid the door shut but didn't lock it.

Coulson put a hand on his arm as he moved to follow her. "Hurt Skye and I will ship you off to our research facility in the North Pole."

May looked bemused.

Ward just nodded and walked into Skye's bunk, shutting the door behind him.


	9. Chapter 9

May didn't even turn as Skye slipped into the cockpit. The girl had been coming in so frequently lately. Before she'd occasionally come in claiming to want to watch the clouds but May knew she had just been trying to establish a bond with her. The girl sought out attention, craved it. She thought of them as a family.

Now however when she came in she made no attempts to make conversation. She'd just sit in the chair and stare absentmindedly out of the window. They'd been following this pattern for two weeks now. Virtually every day was the same. Skye still hadn't gone back to training but she'd sit with Ward in the morning while he was in the gym before coming here. Then they'd all have lunch and she would disappear into Coulson's office for a few hours until she'd make her way into the lab. She rarely made conversation, she spoke just enough to try and convince them she was alright. But she was always with someone. She sought out company like she was afraid to be alone.

She needed to break the routine May decided. If she was ever going to get her life back on track.

"Skye." May said clearly waiting until Skye turned to look at her.

"I need to talk to Coulson for a moment." Skye tried to stand up but May wasn't about to let her run off to someone else. "Will you take over for me?"

"You want me to fly the plane?" Skye asked in disbelief sitting back down.

"Well we're at cruising altitude, all you have to do is keep her steady like I taught you." While she'd never taught Skye all the intricacies of flying there'd been a few occasions before the accident where she would let Skye take over. Besides it was a clear day and they were flying over the Pacific. It's not like Skye could find anything to crash into.

"Erm okay." She agreed biting her lip. May switched control to the co-pilots chair and stood up hovering in the doorway as she watched Skye take over. When she was confident that Skye knew what she was doing she silently left the room and made her way over to Coulson's office passing Ward as he came out of the shower.

"May? Shouldn't you be with Skye right now?" He said checking his watch.

"Follow me."

They both went up into Coulson's office where he was polishing one of his many items of superhero memorabilia. The man had a problem May thought to herself.

"May. Ward." He acknowledged. "Can I help you with something?"

She saw Ward shrug out of the corner of her eye as he sat in one of the chairs. Both men looked at her expectantly.

"It's Skye." She said and watched as they both tensed. This was half the problem itself. "We need to stop coddling her."

"May." Coulson started slowly. "We all agreed we need to give her some time to adjust."

"She's had time." May insisted. "We need to take a more proactive approach."

Ward stood. "We can't force her to do anything May. We'll just scare her off again."

"She isn't a deer in the headlights Ward. She is a grown woman and we can't protect her for the rest of her life she needs to learn to stand on her own."

"She already stood on her own in that forest." Ward snapped. He blamed himself, he always did.

"I'm not saying we throw her back in the field." May said resisting the urge to roll her eyes.

"Then what do you suggest?" Coulson said leaning back in his chair.

"We need to start giving her things to do. She spends all day doing nothing but follow us all around. She doesn't train anymore, when was the last time you even gave her an assignment?"

"She's not sure she wants to be a field agent anymore." Ward said quietly.

"This is the problem. You stopped thinking like her SO."

"It's her decision."

"Exactly. And has she made a decision? Does she want to be a field agent?"

"She doesn't know."

"If it was any other trainee they wouldn't be given the option to consider their options. They would be asked 'do you want to work in the field' and they would be expected to answer yes or no then and there."

"Most trainees don't go through what she went through."

"That's the point. She's had more experience than most ever will. Enough experience to decide what it is she wants." She tried to soften her voice. "I'm not saying we make her choose right now. I'm just saying we need to start introducing her to her work again. Not field work." She said quickly in response to Ward's expression before turning to Coulson. "But maybe you could give her some assignments to get her back into hacking? And start her on a light training programme."

"I'm not forcing her to do something she doesn't want to do." Ward said still angry.

Coulson however was nodding his head. "I see your point. You think it will help her deal with the trauma to keep busy?"

"Precisely." May said thankful one of them was starting to see sense. They both always seemed to have their heads screwed on backwards when it came to Skye.

"Okay. But." He said looking Ward over. "Since _Agent_ Ward is reluctant to train Skye you can take over."

May nodded. Maybe Skye would be interested in learning Tai Chi.

Just as she moved to leave the office Coulson suddenly asked. "Wait, where is Skye? Isn't it your shift with her?"

May smirked before answering. "She's in the cockpit."

"Alone?" Ward said looking slightly incredulous. She was never alone, apart from her quick toilet trips although even then sometimes Jemma would go in with her. As a "girl thing".

"Yes."

"How did you…?" Coulson started.

"I offered to let her pilot the plane. I think you'll fine she'd very capable." May said before leaving to find her new rookie.


End file.
